Beach Day/Transcript

	(theme song)
	Episode begins at the Diaz Household. A guy wearing sunglasses appears on television.
Larry	That would be a great idea! [lowers sunglasses] If I cared. Ohhh! [sits in inner tube with can of soda]
	Larry's friends - two girls and two guys appear around him.
Youths	[reproachfully] Larry!
	The studio audience laughs and applauds. Star and Marco watch the show on the couch, eating pancakes.
Star Butterfly	Oh-ho, boy, I am such a Larry.
Marco Diaz	Totally!
	On TV, the cast of Youths are piled up on a blue couch.
TV Announcer	You're watching an all-day marathon of Youths! Get comfy!
Star and Marco	Done! [high-five each other]
Marco	Oh, man, I missed Earth TV. Today's gonna be perfect.
	Angie walks in holding a piece of clothing covered in ice.
Angie Diaz	Uh, Star? Is this yours? I found it in the back of the freezer for some reason.
	Star tosses her plate of pancakes up, and it lands on Marco's head.
Star	Oh, my gosh! I was wondering where this went! [takes clothing from Angie and shakes off the ice] Marco, look! My frozen swimsuit!
Marco	Cool, cool, cool. [eats piece of pancake]
Angie	You know, it might be easier to find next time if you put it in your closet instead of the freezer.
Star	[chuckles] Oh, Mrs. Diaz. No, my closet is for secrets, not swimsuits!
Angie	[shrugs] Yeah, okay.
	At the living room table, Rafael takes pictures of Mariposa with a slice of quiche in front of her.
Rafael Diaz	Oh, honey, look! It's Mariposa's first breakfast quiche! I've been documenting her cuteness with this trendy instant camera.
Star	Instant camera... Wait just a minute. Swimsuit. Instant camera. Unused beach ball that's in the corner! [gasps] Marco!
Marco	Aah!
Star	I know what we're gonna do today!
Marco	Are we... not watching a marathon?
Star	Look, all the signs are here! My bathing suit, the instant camera, and the final pièce de résistance!
	Star shows Marco the Beach Day photo.
Marco	Uh... the photo from the future that Father Time gave you?
Star	Don't you see? You have a zit on the tip of your nose!
	Screen super-zooms in on the zit on Marco's nose.
Marco	[covers his zit] So?!
Star	Sooo... that zit is exactly the same as the one in the Beach Day photo!
	Screen super-zooms in on the zit on Marco's nose in the photo.
Marco	Ohhhh.
Star	Ever since Father Time gave me this future photo, I've been dreaming of the day it would happen. And that day is today!
Marco	All right, sure. Maybe it is Beach Day.
Star	Oh, you bet your booty it's Beach Day!
	A U.S. flag waves on the TV behind Star, and patriotic music plays in the background.
Star	As soon as my swimsuit is done defrosting, we are going to the beach, and we're gonna have the best day of our lives!
	Scene cuts to the Echo Creek highway; Star and Marco are in a taxicab. Marco is looking at his zit in Star's compact mirror, and Star takes his picture with an instant camera.
Star	Oh, boy. Can't wait for this Beach Day!
Marco	Yeah. At the rate we're going, we might get there before sunset.
Star	Hmm. [to driver] Excuse me. What's, uh... What's taking so long?
Taxi Driver	There's a spill up ahead.
	A goatherder is surrounded by goats next to an overturned truck.
Goatherder	Go on, goat. Get back in the truck!
Goat	[chomp]
Goatherder	Eeh!
Star	Oh, no. There's, like, twenty goats out there! We're gonna be here all day!
Marco	Star, if I cover up my zit with makeup, would the zit in the photo disappear? Or would I just be unable to conceal it no matter how hard I try? How much of my life would be affected by what I choose to do to my zit? Do I have free will?
Star	Marco, you are stressing me out. You know what? I'm just gonna move this along. Super Sparkle Car-Fly Wings!
	Star gives the taxi big purple wings, and it takes off into the sky, flying over the other cars on the highway. One of the goats is chewing on a hubcap. When the taxi flies over, the goat drops the hubcap.
Star	Whoooo!
Marco	Flying cars make me sick!
Star	But it's totally worth it for Beach Day! How's that for a shortcut, Mr. Driver Man?
Taxi Driver	[quietly] Put my car down.
Star	What was that?
Taxi Driver	I said, put... my car... [glares at Star] DOWN!
	Star looks stunned. She lowers her left arm, and the taxi lands on the ground. Star and Marco get out of the taxi, and it drives off.
Marco	Now what?
Star	Don't worry, Marco, I got this. Summoning Sparkle Cloudy Charm!
	Star summons Cloudy.
Cloudy	Oh, hey there, Star!
Star	Cloudy, to the beach!
	Star and Marco climb on top of Cloudy.
Marco	Maybe we should have just done this from the staaaaaart!
	Cloudy takes off into the sky.
Cloudy	Here we goooo! [laughing]
	Cloudy rises up into a dense black smog and descends back to the ground.
Cloudy	[coughing, drops Star and Marco]
Star	Augh!
Marco	[groans]
Cloudy	I can't fly in this! [coughing] It's like breathing death!
	Star sends Cloudy away.
Star	[sighs] Looks like we're walking.
	Scene cuts to middle of Echo Creek; a bodybuilder is doing push-ups with his feet on a fire hydrant, and a teenage boy passes by on a skateboard.
Bodybuilder	491, 492, 493, 494...
	Star and Marco walk past the bodybuilder.
Marco	[out of breath] It's weird. It's almost as if events are conspiring against us.
	Star stops walking, and Marco bumps into her.
Marco	[groans]
Star	Hey, where is the beach!? The ocean's, like, the biggest thing in this world! How have we not run into it already?!
	A surfer walks past Star and Marco holding a surfboard.
Star	Ah! Surfer dude!
Surfer	Huh?
Star	Can you tell us how we get to the beach?
Surfer	The beach is a state of mind, man. Just follow your heart.
Star	That's not helpful, just so you know! Ugh!
Marco	Hey, it's all right. Maybe we just need to take a break. Get some food in our belly. [takes out a sandwich]
Star	No time for food, Marco! I can't afford any distractions. Beach Day is going to happen. I can feel it in my bones. We just gotta wait for a sign.
Marco	......Are we just gonna stand—?
	A seagull swoops down and snatches the sandwich out of Marco's hand.
Marco	Aah!
Star	The sign! C'mon, Marco! Follow that seagull! [pulls Marco by the arm]
Marco	Aah!
	Star and Marco follow the seagull across town.
Seagull	[screeching]
Star and Marco]	[panting]
	Star and Marco eventually arrive at the beach and stare out at the ocean.
Star	We made it. Beach Day is actually happening!
	Star and Marco run down to the beach.
Star	Aah! Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! The water is perfect. The sand is perfect. Everything is perfect! Now all we gotta do is take that picture! [takes out box of crackers] Oh. [laughs] Oh, this is a box of crackers. [reaches into her bag] Where's the real camera? [drops bunch of stuff on the sand] Where is the camera?! [shakes her bag upside-down, gasps] Oh, no! I must have left it in the cab! I left the camera in the caaaab! [puts her face in the sand]
Marco	Hey, it's okay.
Star	Oh, no. The photo's gone, too.
Marco	Oh.
Star	I just don't understand. Today was supposed to be Beach Day! I can't believe I lost the photo and the camera!
Marco	Hey, look at it this way. It's a beautiful day. We can still have a fun day at the beach.
Star	[crosses her arms] Myehh.
Marco	I'll let you make me into a sand mermaid.
Star	[smiles]
	Star and Marco run around the beach with a beach ball, laughing and whooping. They hit the beach ball back and forth. Star uses a Rainbow Fist to hit the ball high into the air.
Marco	I got it! I—!
	Marco gets engulfed by the water. When it washes away, Marco has a bunch of seaweed on his head. He catches the beach ball.
Marco	Got it.
Star	You know what you look like?
	Scene cuts to Star and Marco making Marco look like a sand mermaid; he has a starfish and seashell on his chest to resemble a bra, and his legs are covered in sand shaped like a mermaid tail.
Star	You know, this day actually turned out pretty good after all.
	An old lady taps on Star's shoulder. She has a camera hanging around her neck.
Old Lady	Excuse me. I'm sorry to bother you. It's just that... Oh, you two looked so cute earlier, and I just happened to see this adorable young couple.
Star	We're not a couple. [gasps, sees old lady's camera]
Old Lady	I debated whether or not to even say anything, but when opportunity comes along like this...
Star	Ohhhh! [gasps]
Old Lady	[holding a photograph] ...well, you just have to take the bull by the horns. [laughs]
	Star takes the old lady's photograph away.
Old Lady	Oh.
Star	[looks at photograph] Whaaa...?
Marco	[looks at photograph] No. Way.
	When the photograph comes into focus, it shows Star and Marco holding a beach ball.
Star	It's the Beach Day photo!
Marco	How... How? How?!
Star	It's all part of the paradox! We lost the camera and the photo earlier today because I was supposed to, because this creepy lady was meant to take our Beach Day photo!
Marco	So that means...
Star and Marco	Today is Beach Day!
	Star and Marco dance happily.
Star	It is Beach Day! It is Beach Day! I lived the happiest day of my life!
Marco	Woo-hoo! [laughs] Yeah! Wow! Wow! This is bananas! The paradox came true! It was real! Everything happened for a reason!
	As Star stares at the photo, she stops dancing and looks sad. She takes out Marco's dimensional scissors, opens a dimensional portal, and steps through it.
Marco	Wow! Oh, my goodness! It's so exciting! [notices Star is gone] Star?
	Star enters the Plains of Time. Father Time is seen playing in the stream with his time hamsters.
Father Time	[laughing and humming]
Star	Hey, Father Time? [shows Father Time the photo] Why am I not happy?
Father Time	Oh, hey. It's that beach photo. You look pretty happy to me.
Star	No, I was happy. But that was, like, five minutes ago, and it's already starting to wear off. I thought Beach Day was supposed to be the best day of my life, and everything would be figured out, and then I could just live happily ever after or whatever. But that didn't happen. So why'd you even give this to me?
Father Time	I didn't give that to you.
Star	Uh, yes, you did.
Father Time	No, no, no. You did.
Star	What?
Father Time	Yeah, you gave me the photo to give to Past Star, because you knew she was about to go through a lot of difficult, messy life stuff. You know, what with her mom going missing and her identity as a princess kind of thrown out the window. You wanted to give her something to look forward to.
Star	I gave this to me? But that can't... T-That means this whole time Beach Day was a lie? A lie I told myself?!
Father Time	I can just destroy it for you, seeing as it's giving you so much grief.
Star	You know what? Yeah, sure. Beach Day, no Beach Day — what's the difference? So what if I don't see it up on the fridge every day... or keep it in my little purse always... or... stuff it under my pillow every night?
Father Time	Yeah, who needs it? No photo, no Beach Day, no confusing time paradox. You wouldn't even be here right now asking about it. Who knows where you'd be?
Star	That's a... That's a good question. Some days, knowing I'd be this happy was the only thing that kept me going.
Father Time	So you want me to destroy it?
Star	No. No! No, no, no! You can't! I needed this! You gotta give it to Past Star! Wait, no! I don't want to give it away. But if I keep it, I'll never have given it to myself, so I'll never have had it, and then it'll never have existed at all. [gasps] Whoa! Okay, okay, you know what?
	Star takes a picture of the photograph with her compact phone.
Star	There. Now she can have it.
	Star levitates the photo over to Father Time and opens a portal back to Earth.
Star	Bye, Father Time. Thank you so much.
Father Time	Sure thing! Too bad the hardest times are still ahead.
Star	[sticks her head back through the portal] What was that?
Father Time	Nothing!
	Star leaves, and the portal closes. Father Time takes out a pen and writes "BEACH DAY!" and draws a little yellow sun on the photo.
Father Time	[hums] "B-E-A-C-H"... "Beach Day!"
	Scene cuts back to the Echo Creek beach at sunset. Star watches the sunset, and Marco makes a sand sculpture of Ludo.
Star	So basically, Beach Day was never real. I was chasing some perfect idea that didn't even exist. Don't get me wrong. It got me though a lot. But... now how am I supposed to know if everything will end up okay?
Marco	Well, I guess we just don't.
Star	Huh?
Marco	Yeah, I mean... you don't know what'll happen in the future, but who does? It wasn't the Beach Day itself that made you happy, right? It... It was... It was you.
Star	Huh.
Marco	You didn't wait for someone to tell you everything would be okay. You created your own happiness through self-determination! Anyway, I thought that was pretty cool.
Star	Yeah. Maybe you're right.
Marco	[smushes sand sculpture of Ludo] Well, I'm kinda Beach Day'd out. [chuckles] What do you say we head home?
Star	I say let's do it.
Marco	Wait! We don't have a way to get home!
Star	Actually...
	Star levitates a shopping cart partially buried in the sand.
Star	Ah? Ahh?
Marco	Star, I'm not wheeling you all the way home in a shopping cart.
Star	[chuckles] Not wheeling, silly.
	Cut to Star and Marco riding a shopping cart with wings through the sky.
Star	Woo-hoo-hoo! Woo-hoo!
Marco	Aaaah! No, no, no!
Star	[laughs] Woo-hoo!
Marco	I'm gonna be sick! But it's worth it for Beach Day!
Star	Beach Daaaaay!