Episode begins at the Britta's Tacos fast food restaurant. Several Echo Creek citizens are seen hanging around the restaurant eating food. Star Butterfly, Marco, Mariposa, and Cloudy arrive at Britta's Tacos. Marco is carrying Mariposa in a baby carrier, and Cloudy is carrying Mariposa's baby supplies.
Star Butterfly And this, Mariposa, is Britta's Tacos.
Mariposa Diaz [blowing raspberries]
Star No, no, no, no, no. It's pronounced "tacos". "Ta-cos". I had trouble with it, too.
Marco Diaz I am so pumped! All I need is 50 more punches on my Frequent Eater card, then I'll win... the mystery prize!
Star [gasps] I hope it's a T-shirt!
Marco For 200 tacos, it'd better be a lot cooler than a T-shirt.
Star I think it's a shirt.
Marco All right, Mariposa. I got your bottles, your teddy, and your diaper bag.
Star So what are we doing today, besides eatin' tacos?
Marco Do? Summers are all about relaxin' and doing nothin'.
Star Ohhh, okay. [slumps onto restaurant table] After the year I've had, nothin' is all I wanna do.
Marco I'm gonna get some tacos.
Star Tacos sound good. [straining] Cloudyyyyyyy!
Star summons Cloudy next to her.
Cloudy Aaah!
Star rides on top of Cloudy to the restaurant counter. Sensei Brantley and Oskar Greason appear before them as Britta's Tacos employees.
Sensei Brantley Welcome to Britta's Tacos.
Marco Sensei?
Star And Oskar!
Oskar Greason Hey.
Marco What are you doing here?
Sensei Dude, I've been working here for the last six months. But you'd know that if you hadn't just up and left. I see you're a dad now. Figures.
Oskar Classic Mango.
Star Classic Mango.
Marco Dude, this is... this is my sister.
Sensei Ooh, I get it. You're hiding it from Jackie. Don't worry. Your secret is safe with me.
Marco I'm not hiding anything. This IS my sister. A-And even if she wasn't, there's no drama between me and Jackie.
Sensei [winks at Marco and gives him a thumbs-up]
Marco [sighs] Can I just get 10 tacos?
Oskar [to Star] Hey, weren't we supposed to hang out, like, last summer?
Star Yeah, guess so. Whatcha been up to?
Oskar I got a job at Britta's Tacos.
Star Niiiice.
Sensei gives Marco a bag of tacos and uses a hole puncher to punch holes in his "Tacos Frequent Eater" card.
Marco If I just pace myself, I should have no problem knocking back all 50 tacos today.
Marco unwraps one of the tacos and eats it. Some of the taco meat falls on Mariposa's head.
Marco [strained] That's four down. Ugh, it's gonna be a long day.
Star Why don't you just have someone else eat them?
Star summons a kitty cat with a spinning tail.
Star All you need are the punches.
Marco Oh-ho-ho-ho, yeah!
Two bodybuilders are placing an order to Sensei.
Bodybuilder 1 Five lengua tacos, extra lengua.
Marco Uh, excuse me. Could I have your punches?
Bodybuilders All right, kid! [about to punch Marco]
Marco No, no, no, no, no! Your Loyalty Card punches. I'm trying to get the mystery prize.
Bodybuilder 2 I dunno, man. I really wanna punch you.
Marco C'mon, guys. Can you say no to this? [holds up Mariposa]
Mariposa [babbles]
Bodybuilder 1 Whoa! How could I say no to the father of such a cute baby?
Marco Father? Oh, no, I'm, uh... [sighs] Never mind.
Sensei punches more holes in Marco's card with the hole puncher.
Marco Ohhhh-ho-ho-ho-ho! That mystery prize is as good as mine!
Principal Skeeves, Mr. Candle, and Miss Skullnick appear at the restaurant counter.
Principal Skeeves [to Sensei] So you mean to tell me, I can't get apple slices with my que-sa-dill-a?!
Star Teachers? Oh, no, no, no, no! I just ditched an entire year of school while we were in Mewni! Push me under the table, Marco!
Marco What?
Star Just do it!
Marco Okay! Geez! [pushes Star under the table]
Skeeves Well, well, well, Mr. Diaz. Getting along well without an education?
Marco Uh-uh-uh-uh!
Marco slaps his "High School Equivalency Diploma" on the table in front of Principal Skeeves.
Marco Read it and weep! I got my diploma and everything.
Marco's diploma gets greasy and slightly see-through from all the taco grease on the table.
Marco Ewww!
Mr. Candle Oh, no. Put that official business away, Marco. It's summer.
Marco Crandle?! Did you, uh, follow me from Mewni?!
Mr. Candle I don't know what a Mewni is. I'm just here in Echo Creek helping kids find their lifelong posts. [stutters] Careers. Good lifelong careers.
Skeeves [slaps Marco on the back] Relax, my boy! It's summer!
Marco Well, since everything is cool, can I have your punches?
Skeeves Yeah, sure!
Mr. Candle Okey-dokey.
As Marco, Skeeves, and Mr. Candle walk off-screen, StarFan13 appears in the bushes near Star and Marco's table.
Star [laughs] I'm never going to school.
StarFan13 [breathing heavily] Star!
Star Aaaah!
StarFan drags Star into a spinning hug.
StarFan13 I thought you'd never come back to me! Selfie! [takes selfie with Star] And pout! [takes another selfie] Now smolder! [takes another selfie]
Star If we're gonna do this, Mama needs a horchata. Marco! Earth money!
StarFan13 [sees Marco and Mariposa] Whoa! Nice baby!
Marco Thanks.
StarFan13 [takes picture of Mariposa] I'm posting this right now! Wait. Oh, Marco, is it cool if I post this? You know, because Jackie might see it.
Marco Uh, yeah, of course. Why not?
StarFan13 Some people get really awkward when they run into an ex. You know, it's, like, drama! [accidentally drops Star on the ground] Oh! Oops! [picks up Star] It could get really weird.
Marco Everything's totally great between Jackie and me. No weirdness here!
StarFan13 Oh, that's good. 'Cause it's Taco Tuesday. Jackie always comes to Taco Tuesdays.
Marco [puts Mariposa down on Cloudy] Well, I look forward to seeing her. I gotta go to the bathroom.
Marco enters the public restroom and splashes his face with water.
Marco [sighs] What does StarFan know? It's not gonna be weird to see Jackie. We're friends.
A grown man with the same hairstyle as Marco's pops up from inside the bathroom stall behind Marco.
Man I thought me and my ex were cool. But last year, I ran into her at this very taco stand. It was terrifying! And she threatened to squeeze hot sauce into my eye! And I've been hiding out in this here stall ever since.
Marco Well, that's you, man. Jackie and I – we had a healthy relationship.
Man Yeah? Well, why'd you break up then?
Marco Oh. Well, you know, 'cause she thought I was in love with... my best friend.
Man Oh, brah, that's, like, way worse than what I did!
Marco Oh, no... I was a terrible boyfriend.
From outside the bathroom, StarFan13 pounds on the door.
StarFan13 Yoo-hoo, Marco! Guess who's here! You have a visitor! Marco!
Marco [whispers] Jackie!
StarFan13 uses Star's hand to slam the bathroom door with continuous Narwhal Blasts.
StarFan13 Marco! Marco! Marco! Marco! Marco! Great work, Star!
Star Yeah. Yeah, you bet.
Marco slowly comes out of the bathroom.
Ferguson O'durguson and Alfonzo Dolittle (o.s.) Hey, Marco!
Marco Huh?
Ferguson and Alfonzo run up to hug Marco.
Ferguson [laughs]
Alfonzo [laughs] Marco, it's so good to see you!
Ferguson Are you all right, man? You look a little freaked.
Marco No, no, no, I'm fine. I mean, I just thought you guys were... maybe... Jackie or something.
Ferguson Jackie? Nah. Last I heard, she was studying abroad in France, so I don't think she'll be coming by anytime soon. I mean, unless she wants a taco. [laughs] Say hello to our new D&D group!
Ferguson introduces four cool-looking guys and girls.
Cool Girl What up?
Marco These guys play D&D?
Alfonzo Oh, being a nerd has gotten super cool since you left.
Cloudy Special delivery from Star! [puts Mariposa's baby carrier on Marco]
Marco What the heck?!
Mariposa [giggles]
Ferguson Cool! Star and Marco had a baby!
Marco No! It's not our baby! It's—!
Ferguson Aw, cool! Star's here! Guys, this is the one I was telling you about. She does real magic.
Alfonzo Hey, Star! Can you, uh, conjure a unicorn stampede?
Star Awww, unicorns.
StarFan13 Sorry, guys, she's kinda busy at the moment doing nothing. See?
StarFan13 picks up Star's arm, and it flops back down on the table.
StarFan13 Just like an old cat! [crazed laughter] I could do this all day!
Sensei gives bag of tacos to Ferguson and Alfonzo and Marco's Frequent Eater card to Marco.
Sensei Here's 30 tacos and 30 punches.
Marco I'm getting really close! Thanks for the punches, guys.
Ferguson Ah, sure thing, Marco! Hey, I'll see ya! Gotta go crush some elves!
Alfonzo I'm sure we'll see you really soon though!
Ferguson and Alfonzo leave. Scene cuts to nighttime. Star, Marco, Mariposa, Cloudy, and StarFan13 are still at Britta's Tacos, and Marco is still eating tacos.
Marco [chomps, gulps, groans] I just need two more punches. [groans] Why hasn't anyone else come by?
StarFan13 This is more of a lunch place, actually.
Marco Wait! Janna! She can get me a few punches, I bet!
Sensei Hold on there, bro! Janna isn't welcome around here anymore! She's banned for life!
Sensei points at a wall with several pictures of Janna on it, some of which show her wearing disguises.
Marco [sighs] Looks like it's up to you, Diaz. Let's get this over with.
Mariposa [babbling]
Marco [walks up to counter] Two tacos, please.
Sensei Bad news, Marco. You bought us out of every ingredient. All we have to make tacos with are these home-grown Echo Creek white-hot pain peppers.
Marco [gags, gulps] Haven't those been outlawed in, like, 16 states?
Sensei What am I? A cop? Embrace the pain!
Marco [sighs] Nah, man. I'm done. My quest for the mystery prize is a bust. Two punches! I just needed two!
Someone punches Marco's arm twice from off-screen.
Marco Ow! Ow! Huh?
Jackie Lynn Thomas appears beside Marco.
Jackie Lynn Thomas You want chips on the side?
Marco Jackie?! I thought you were...! Hi!
Jackie [sees Mariposa] Aww, who's this little lady? Looks like you've been busy.
Marco She's not mine! I mean... she's... she's mine. Just not mine mine. She's my sister.
Jackie [laughs] Classic Diaz. Oh, hey, I've got somebody I'd like you to meet.
Chloe appears next to Jackie.
Chloe Bonjour! (Hello)
Jackie Chloe, meet Marco.
Marco Oh, hi! How do you guys know each other?
Chloe We met in France.
Jackie She taught me all about the beauty of French architecture and how to do sweet parkour off it. Montre-lui (Show him), Chloe.
Chloe D'accord! (Okay)
Chloe runs up to Star's table and does a circular parkour swing off the umbrella stand.
Star [whispers] She's so cool.
Chloe Voilà!
Jackie Now I'm showing her the coolest of Echo Creek life: skateboarding and pain pepper tacos!
Marco Pain pepper tacos? Hey! Uh, if you give me your two punches, I'll buy them for you. [gives money to Sensei]
Jackie Dude, Diaz! What a gentleman!
Jackie takes two pepper tacos from Sensei and gives one to Chloe.
Chloe Ready for ze pain?
Jackie and Chloe Un, deux, trois! (One, two, three) [bite into tacos]
Jackie Aah! [breathing heavily]
Chloe Oh, sacré bleu! Oh, my gosh, it's so spicy!
Jackie [laughing]
Marco [smiles]
Jackie Well, Marco, thanks for the tacos. It's really nice to see you.
Marco Really? 'Cause I wasn't sure if things were cool between us.
Jackie Of course things are cool, bro. You just bought us tacos.
Marco I don't know. I was in the bathroom thinking about life, and it dawned on me: Marco, you were a terrible boyfriend to Jackie.
Jackie [wide-eyed]
Marco And you're Jackie.
Jackie [laughing]
Marco What?
Jackie Nothing. You're just the best. Look, as boyfriends go, you were pretty standard. But you always knew how to make me laugh.
Marco Standard? You're not just saying that?
Jackie Look, I learned a lot about myself in France, and we just weren't the best match. And that's okay. It doesn't mean we can't be friends.
Marco Yeah. That's what I was hoping.
StarFan13 [sobbing] That's soooo beautiful! [slapping Star's hand on the table]
Jackie Okay, Marco. Well, we better get going. Bye, Star!
Star Bye, Jackie!
Jackie Now, she's a special girl, Marco. [ruffles Marco's hair] Make sure you don't mess that one up. Stay amazing.
Chloe Au revoir! (Till we meet again)
Jackie and Chloe ride away on skateboards while holding hands.
Marco Bye.
On Star and Marco's table, Marco's "Tacos Frequent Eater" card has 200 punches. Next to the card is a napkin that says "TWO PUNCHES! CHLOE & JACKIE" with a smiley face.
Star [gasps] Marco's got all 50 punches! [grabs card and gives it to Sensei] Prize! Now!
Sensei Sorry, the prize has been stolen. [chuckles]
Star What?! Well, what was it?!
Oskar A T-shirt. Said "Britta's Tacos" on it. Pretty sweet.
Marco You know, the real prize was getting to see all our friends.
StarFan13 [breathing heavily, hugs Marco] Friends!
Marco [gags] I think I just threw up a little bit.
(end song)
ved Star vs. the Forces of Evil Episode Transcripts
Season 1
Star Comes to EarthParty With a PonyMatch MakerSchool SpiritMonster ArmThe Other Exchange StudentCheer Up, StarQuest BuyDiaz Family VacationBrittney's PartyMewbertyPixtopiaLobster ClawsSleep SpellsBlood Moon BallFortune CookiesFreeze DayRoyal PainSt. Olga's Reform School for Wayward PrincessesMewnipendance DayThe Banagic IncidentInterdimensional Field TripMarco Grows a BeardStorm the Castle
Season 2
My New Wand!Ludo in the WildMr. Candle CaresRed BeltStar on WheelsFetchStar vs. Echo CreekWand to WandStarstruckCamping TripStarsittingOn the JobGoblin DogsBy the BookGame of FlagsGirls' Day OutSleepoverGift of the CardFriendenemiesIs MysteryHungry LarrySpider With a Top HatInto the WandPizza ThingPage TurnerNaysayaBon Bon the Birthday ClownRaid the CaveTrickstarBabyRunning with ScissorsMathmagicThe Bounce LoungeCrystal ClearThe Hard WayHeinousAll Belts are OffCollateral DamageJust FriendsFace the MusicStarcrushed
Season 3
Return to MewniMoon the UndauntedBook Be GoneMarco and the KingPuddle DefenderKing LudoToffeeScent of a HoodieRest in PuddingClub SnubbedStranger DangerDemoncismSophomore SlumpLint CatcherTrial by SquirePrincess TurdinaStarfariSweet DreamsLava Lake BeachDeath PeckPonymoniumNight LifeDeep DiveMonster BashStump DayHoliday SpellcialThe Bogbeast of BoggabahTotal Eclipsa the MoonButterfly TrapLudo, Where Art Thou?Is Another MysteryMarco Jr.Skooled!Booth BuddiesBam Ui Pati!Tough LoveDivideConquer
Season 4
Butterfly FolliesEscape from the Pie FolkMoon RemembersSwim SuitRansomgramLake House FeverYada Yada BerriesDown by the RiverThe Ponyhead Show!Surviving the SpiderbitesOut of BusinessKelly's WorldCurse of the Blood MoonPrincess Quasar Caterpillar and the Magic BellGhost of Butterfly CastleCornball!Meteora's LessonThe Knight ShiftQueen-NappedJunkin' JannaA Spell with No NameA Boy and His DC-700XEThe Monster and the QueenCornonationDoop-DoopBritta's TacosBeach DayGone Baby GoneSad Teen HotlineJannanigansMama StarReady, Aim, FireThe Right WayHere to HelpPizza PartyThe Tavern at the End of the MultiverseCleaved
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