Club Snubbed/Transcript

	(Theme song)
	Scene opens inside. Queen Moon Butterfly is ringing a hand bell.
Queen Butterfly	Kingdoms of Mewni, each year we hold this dance to celebrate the peace between us. Welcome to the Silver Bell Ball. [rings bell]
	King River Butterfly stars clapping while everyone else remains silent.
King Butterfly	Whoa! Yeah-ha-ha! Wahoo! Woop! Yeah!
Queen Butterfly	The rules of the ball are the same as always. Each royal heir will dance with all the others, representing the bonds between our kingdoms.
King Spiderbite	[whispering] Their kingdom got taken over by rats. Ehw.
Queen Spiderbite	[whispering back] How could they let that happen?
River	Hey! Hey! They were big rats.
	Pony Head floats over to Star Butterfly.
Pony Head	Ooh, girl. [looking at the Princes] Okay, okay. What do you think of the line-up this year? Be honest.
Star	It's just the same bunch of borings as every year, Pony.
Pony Head	Emm, okay, that's fine, but, like, check out Prince Larry Kelpbottom. Mm-hmm, okay. It's like somebody came up and hit him with a hottie stick.
Star	Yeah, I guess it is kinda cool to see everyone again. [turning] Hey, Princess Jaggs.
Princess Jaggs	[waving] Hey.
Star	[looking over Pony Head] Hi, Princess Spiderbite.
Princess Spiderbite	Hello.
Pony Head	Oh, look, there's your annoying cousin.
Star	Yeah. Guess I should say hi. [waving] Hi, Rock.
	Rock is busy typing on his phone.
Star	[louder] Hi, Rock, your cousin, over here. Rock Johansen.
	Rock glances at Star, then back to his phone.
Star	Okay well, he hasn't changed. [turns] Oh, looks like Rich Pigeon got himself some new legs.
Pony Head	[ses an empty chair] Ooh, somebody's missing, Star.
Star	Yep. He's always late.
Pony Head	Well this is where you two met, isn't it?
Star	Mm-hmm.
Pony Head	Drama.
	Star doesn't respond; her arms are crossed.
Pony Head	Drama!
	Pony Head looks at Star, who remains unresponsive.
Pony Head	Drama, drama, drama, drama, drama, drama...
	Star clamps Pony Head's muzzle closed.
Star	Pony, no drama this year. I told my parents I was gonna focus on the princess biz.
Pony Head	Oh, come on, you're the bomb at shakin' up these dusty old traditions, girl.
Star	Not this year.
Pony Head	Oh, come on.
Star	No.
Pony Head	Come on.
Star	No, Pony. Seriously.
Pony Head	Oh, Did you not hear me when I said come on?
	Pony Head pushes herself against Star's face.
Pony Head	Come on, come on.
Star	I'm serious.
Queen Butterfly	[from across the room] Shhhhhhhhhhh!
Star	I've caused a lot of trouble this summer. It's time to be a better princess.
	The door burns down to reveal Tom Lucitor as he arrives.
Star	Sunglasses at night. Classy.
Manfred	Announcing the arrival of Prince Thomas Lucitor.
Tom	Hey, everybody.
Manfred	And his parents, Lord and Lady Lucitor, of the underworld.
	Wrathmelior walks across the room. She snorts as her horns scrape the chandelier. She eventually takes her seat along with her husband.
King Butterfly	[waving] Hello, Wrathmelior. [turns] Hi, Dave.
King Dave	Hey.
Manfred	Will the dancers please stand for the commencement bow?
	All the princes and princesses take their bows. Tom bows to Rich Pigeon.
Star	[gasps] Did you just see that?
Pony Head	Oh ho ho, yes! Ooh, I think the whole room saw that. Girl, you're getting club-snubbed.
Star	Oh, no... wait. What is that?
Pony Head	Oh, I don't know, it's just the best way to get someone all up in your business. Watch. [shout across the room] Hey, Kelpbottom.
	Kelpbottom grins, and gestures to himself.
Pony Head	Kelpbottom! No, no, not you. Not you. The handsome one.
King Kelpbottom	You hear that, honey? I'm the handsome one.
King Pony Head	[snorts]
Star	Pony, what the... I thought you liked him.
Pony Head	Oh, I do, I do. But listen, the more you ignore somebody, the more they fall deeply in love with you. That's like science. It's scientific or something like that.
	Kelpbottom has made his way over to Pony Head. He sniffs Pony Head's mane.
Pony Head	Ugh, okay. Can you please give me some space, 'cause I really need that from you, okay? Thank you. Bye-bye. [to Star] It works every time.
Star	Weird.
Queen Butterfly	[rings bell] Let the first dance begin.
	No one stands up.
Manfred	Ahem. Anyone? [glances] Oh, my. It seems Prince Thomas has taken the initiative, and he appears to be walking towards Princess Star. Star and Thomas have always been the best dancers at every Silver Bell Ball, and we all know they had a very tumultuous relationship before breaking up last year.
Star	[groaning] Manfred.
Tom	May I have this dance...
Star	[sigh] Well, all right. Let's do this.
Tom	Princess Jaggs?
	Some of the Kings and Queens gasp.
Jaggs	Uh, yeah, okay.
Tom	You look lovely today.
Jaggs	What? No, you do.
	The two player orchestra begins playing.
Manfred	Well, this is a surprising turn of events. No mistake. At the previous Silver Bell Balls, Tom has always chosen Princess Star first to dance.
	Tom refuses to look at Star while he dances.
Star	[gasps] Pony, I think I am getting club-snubbed.
Pony Head	Ooh, this is some next-level club-snubbing. He wants you bad, girl.
Star	Ugh. Tom always does this. When is he gonna realize I am not interested? [to herself] Okay, calm yourself, Butterfly. You're a princess, for goodness sake.
	Tom kisses Jaggs' hand.
Star	Oh, it's on.
	Queen Butterfly rings her bell. Star gets up to take her first dance. She walks up to Tom.
Star	Hmm, let's see, let's see. I choose you.
	She points at Rich Pigeon.
Pony Head	Oh, oh, oh!
Manfred	Oh, Princess Star has chosen Prince Rich Pigeon as her first dance partner. Could there be a new romance waiting in the wings?
Star	[laughing] Oh, Richard. I had no idea you were such a good dancer.
	Rich coos as his weight pulls Star and himself to the ground. Queen Butterfly rings her bell, and Star takes her seat.
Pony Head	Good job, girl.
Star	Mm-hmm, that oughta show him.
	Tom and Kelpbottom laugh. Star growls. The musicians begin to play, Tom chooses another Princess other than Star, and Star gapes. Star takes the next turn, and picks the same Princess Tom just danced in an attempt to piss him off. The evening continues. Pony head also joins in the fun by refusing to pick Kelpbottom. Star grows more and more angry but Tom continues to play it cool. Queen Butterfly rings her bell.
Manfred	At last, the dancers have completed the ceremony, and are seated with their parents. [chuckles] All except Star and Thomas.
King Butterfly	[To King Lucitor] They're saving the best for last.
	Both kings laugh nervously.
Queen Butterfly	[sigh] Come on, Star. Dance with him.
	Star stomps angrily over to Tom.
Star	May I have this dance... Manfred?
	Everyone gasps.
Queen Butterfly	Oh, dear.
Pony Head	Oh, snap! [laughs while eating popcorn]
Manfred	[happily] No one has ever asked me to dance. [giggles]
	The pair begin to dance.
Manfred	Ladies and gentlemen, Star has asked me, Manfred, to the dance floor. I feel like I'm in a dream.
King Lucitor	[to King Butterfly] Your daughter just club-snubbed my son.
King Butterfly	Your son's been club-snubbing my daughter all night!
King Lucitor	My son is a gentleman.
King Butterfly	My daughter is a delicate flower.
King Lucitor	Delicate flower? Let's see how delicate a flower you are!
	Tom walks out of the hall slowly, sadly looking at star.
Star	Oh, unbelievable!
	The two kings continue to fight as Star follows Tom outside
Star	Oh, No-no-no-no-no, you do not get to make sad eyes at me. This is your fault. Look, I still don't wanna date you. I have been through a lot lately, and what I really need is a friend. But all you wanna do is play your little childish games.
Tom	Games?
Star	Oh, don't act all innocent, you club-snubber.
Tom	What? Star, I was there on Song Day. I-I know you're with Marco now.
Star	Oh, Ruberiot. That song is gonna haunt me for the rest of my life.
Tom	No, no. It was a huge wake-up call. I finally realized you're not into me. So during the dance, I wanted to do the right thing, and give you space. If-if you'd asked to dance, I totally would've, but... I wanted it to be your choice.
Star	Okay, first of all, me and Marco, not a thing.
Tom	Really?
Star	Hey, not the point. Second of all, giving me space doesn't mean pretending I don't exist. That's just rude.
Tom	I was just trying to do the right thing.
Star	Well it would've been nice if you didn't ignore me all night.
Tom	[bursting into flame, yelling] I don't know how to be nice! At least give me credit for trying. This wasn't easy.
	Tom fire blasts his horse drawn carriage. Star casts a cloudy charm spell, and rises up towards him.
Star	[yelling] You're being really dramatic.
Tom	[yelling] Whatever, Star. You know I was just trying to give you what you want.
Star	[yelling] This isn't what I want.
	A window breaks as a chair from inside is thrown outside and lands in between the two of them. The two of them look inside to see their fathers fighting physically.
King Butterfly	Look what you did! You're paying for that chair!
King Lucitor	I'll pay for the chair when you pay for all the damage Toffee caused. I'm starting to rethink being allies with your kingdom.
King Butterfly	Oh, why don't you just crawl back into that little hole you came out of?
Queen Butterfly	Please, everyone, settle down.
	The bird royalty coo.
Queen Spiderbite	How could they let that happen?
	Star groans in frustration and walks back over to Tom.
Star	Tom, may I have this dance?
Tom	I'd be delighted.
	The two of them scoff at each other and begin to dance. As they dance, their fathers eventually notice their kids' beautiful dancing.
King Butterfly	Aw, look at 'em go.
	Queen Butterfly eventually rings her bell to end the dance. The pair is looking into each other's eyes. Star is smiling.
Tom	Um, Star? We should probably stop dancing.
Star	Oh, yeah. Yeah. Right. Right.
	Queen Butterfly stops ringing her bell.
Queen Butterfly	And this concludes the Silver Bell Ball.
	The royalty applaud. Queen Lucitor (Wrathmelior) even lets out some fiery tears.
Queen Lucitor	Awwww.
Star	I forgot what a good dancer you are.
Tom	Yeah, thanks. So, um, would you maybe wanna get a corn shake sometime?
Star	Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I could do that.
	Some of the princes/princesses run between the pair while heading out the door.
Pony Head	Beep beep. Excuse us. Look at me, Star. Ooh, it's a new club-snub record.
	Star and Tom both laugh.