Episode begins in New Monstertown. Princess Spiderbite, Slime Monster, and Slime Monster's parents come out of a small house.
Penelope Spiderbite Thanks again, Mr. Slime, for the slime meringue pie. It was perfect. Not too much meringue.
Mr. Slime Glad you could come by, Princess Spiderbite. Sorry about the, uh... invasion.
Heavy footsteps thud off-screen.
Penelope and Slimes [panicked sounds]
Mina Loveberry appears leading an army of Solarian Warriors.
Penelope and Slimes [scream, run back into house]
Mina Loveberry [motions army to stop] Wait! Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa, hold up! [lifts helmet visor] What happened to Doug-Doug?
Doug-Doug, the Solarian Warrior that Eclipsa destroyed with the Spell With No Name in "The Right Way", is seen, his armor and the nearby trees still sizzling with purple energy.
Solarian Warrior [deep voice] Doug-Doug looks pretty gone-gone if you ask me. [laughs]
Mina [raises fist]
Solarian Warrior Oh, no. No-no-no. [lowers visor]
Mina [punches Solarian Warrior's face] Go check his helmet! Well, boys,

it looks like Eclipsa wants to get weird.

A cockerel is seen on one of the sizzling tree stumps.
Mina I can get weird, too!
Scene cuts to the Monster Temple. Star, Eclipsa, Marco, and Janna run inside the temple.
Eclipsa Butterfly Archibald, close the gate!
Archibald Yes, milady! [pulls lever to close temple gate]
Eclipsa Where's Meteora?
Mina and her army reach the base of the temple mountain.
Sebastian [shrieks]
Mina uses her armor pigtails like a helicopter to fly up to the temple.
Mina [sing-song] Hellooooo! [leans on temple] Guess what! You're out of options, Princess!
Star Butterfly Mina!
Mina I'm givin' you 'til the crow of this cockerel to surrender Eclipsa and her husband.
Mina sets the cockerel from earlier down on top of the temple gate.
Mina And don't even think about trying any more of that magic blasty funny business like you did to Doug-Doug! [flies away]
Star Mina! Get back here and fight! I'm gonna knock the cheese right off your cracker, you... you no-good helicopter head!
Eclipsa Star, I appreciate your fighting spirit, but I don't know if I have the energy to do that spell again.
Star [laughs] Yeah, that's right! You're not doing that spell again! That thing was insane! I mean, kudos on taking out that Solarian Warrior, but you decimated everything around it.
Marco Diaz So is that rooster gonna crow at sunrise or something?
Star What? No. It's a dumb bird, Marco. It crows whenever it wants. And when it does, we'll have to be ready for Mina.
Meteora Butterfly Beh! Beh! [drops teddy bear]
Eclipsa [picks up teddy bear] Here, sweetie. Here's your Beh.
Meteora [pushes teddy bear away] Beh!
Star and Eclipsa look to the sky. An eagle swoops down toward the temple.
Star and Eclipsa Aah!
Star and Eclipsa jump out of the way as the eagle flies into the temple. Moon and River appear riding on the eagle's back. Moon jumps from the eagle's back and lands on the floor. River falls flat on his face.
Moon Star?
Star Mom?! You came! [runs up to Moon and hugs her] Did you see them, Mom? Those soldiers are everywhere! We defeated one of them, but it took everything we had!
Moon looks around to the other people inside the temple.
Moon I'm here to help.
In one of the temple rooms, all of Star's friends that were scarred by Doug-Doug's Solarian Sword lie on beds, and they are cared for by nurses.
Talon Raventalon [moans]
Jorby [licks his scar]
Moon Oh, dear. Okay, well, this can be treated. We need to figure out how to get the glow-wounded to the Magic Sanctuary.
Scene cuts to Meteora's bedroom. River enters. Globgor is still lying in bed.
River Butterfly Globgor, old boy! [laughs] I heard you were up here! Thought you could use a good old Dad hang.
Globgor [groans] Is my family okay?
The magic scar on Globgor's body glows.
River They're... fine, yes. [clears throat] Moon-Pie has everything well in hand. Uh, she always knows what's right. ...You know what you need? Some meat! Yes! Fix you up right as rain! [laughs]
Globgor [groans]
Scene cuts to the temple meeting room. Star, Marco, Eclipsa, Meteora, Moon, Buff Frog, Lady Whosits, Sir Dashing of Muscleton, Archibald, and the giraffe royal guard are gathered around a circular table.
Eclipsa All right, everyone. So... yes, we threw everything we had at the first Solarian Warrior, and now there are maybe a hundred more. We need ideas.
Sir Dashing of Muscleton Oh! Eclipsa, why don't you do that sweet thing again? You know, that... with your wand t-thing? [makes magic sounds] You know, that--
Star She's not doing that again.
Eclipsa That was too dangerous.
Sir Dashing Uh, I thought it was rad.
Buff Frog My ancestors fought the Solarian Warriors. Now is my turn.
Marco Whoa. They fought those things? How'd they do?
Buff Frog Eh, bad. Very bad. Everyone die. Total shame.
River [walks past in background] Ah! [muttering]
Moon River? Where are you going?
River I'm going to get that man some meat! He is a king, for corn's sake!
Eclipsa He's a vegetarian!
River Fine! I'll get him some chicken!
Eclipsa Moon, can I have a quick word?
Eclipsa walks off-screen. Moon and Star look at each other confused. Moon shrugs her shoulders before following Eclipsa.
Eclipsa (o.s.) Oh, come on, you stupid thing!
Eclipsa rattles a Snookers vending machine with her backside.
Eclipsa [growls] Oh, come on!
Moon Eclipsa, how about I hold the baby while you... do that?
Eclipsa hangs off the side of the vending machine.
Eclipsa No, it's fine, thanks! [straining]
Moon What did you want to talk about?
Eclipsa Ugh. It looks even more stuck now. How did it get more stuck? Oh, sorry. Okay. As you heard, I used a spell on that first warrior. It was... It was quite destructive.
Moon I saw the damage. It's a good thing no one was harmed.
Eclipsa No one except that warrior! [laughs]
Moon [forced chuckle]
Eclipsa I may have miscalculated a bit. I think I can give it another go.
Eclipsa pushes Meteora inside the vending machine's "PUSH" slot.
Meteora [giggles]
Eclipsa This time, I'll be more focused. I figure all I really need to do is take out Mina. That show of force may be enough to make an impression on the other warriors.
Meteora crawls inside the vending machine, grabs a Snookers bar, crawls back out of the machine, and gives the Snookers to Eclipsa.
Eclipsa Thank you, sweetie! [to Moon] Fancy a Snookers?
Moon Thank you, no. Look, if you think using that spell again is a good idea--
Eclipsa [munching] Sorry. I'm a nervous eater. Mmm. I'm open to suggestions.
Moon Well, I'm not the queen, but if I were, I'd start by getting the people to safety, then deal with Mina.
Eclipsa Oh, right! Good idea! All right, everyone! We have a plan. We need to get the people of Monstertown to safety. Buff Frog, prepare the glow-wounded for travel to the Magic Sanctuary. Sir Dashing, make sure we have enough provisions for all the evacuees.
Sir Dashing Just gonna weigh in one more time on doing that thing again.
Sir Dashing I'll get the provisions ready. [walks away while making magic sounds]
Marco How can we help?
Star [grabs Marco's hand] Marco and I are gonna... take care of the pig goats!
Marco, Eclipsa, and Moon Pig goats?
Star Pig goats! Come on, Marco, let's go! [pulls Marco off-screen by the hand]
Marco Whoa!
Eclipsa Thank you for your guidance, Moon.
Moon Of course. [walks away]
Eclipsa Maybe once everyone's ready, we can sneak out through the canals. Or... I mean, I know Star wasn't a fan, but maybe I can use my Annihilation Spell again once everybody's safe.
Moon pulls the lever by the temple gate to open it.
Eclipsa What are you doing?! The warriors are out there!
Moon You and Globgor should surrender.
Eclipsa What?! Moon, w-what do you mean?
Moon Surrender now, and this is all over.
Scene cuts to Star and Marco outside the pig goat stables.
Marco So what are we doing exactly?
Star See, here's the thing. Pig goats are really dumb. They won't run from danger, so we gotta put them out to pasture so they don't end up trapped in here.
Marco Right. Uh, I guess what I mean is, this seems a little random. Shouldn't we help out with the evacuation?
Star Yeah. We probably should. [sits on wooden fence] It's just... I'm so overwhelmed, Marco. My friends came to help the kingdom, and then they got wounded, and it's all my fault.
Marco Yeah, but your mom said the Magic Sanctuary will fix 'em.
Star Yeah, I know what she said. It's just, this has been a lot to deal with. [sighs] I know. I'm bad. I'm bad! I'm a bad person, right? My friends are wounded, and I'm basically hiding.
Marco smiles at Star.
Marco Hiiii-YAH!
Marco kicks the stable doors open.
Pig Goats [bleating]
Star Marco, what was that for?
Marco You're not the only one who can kick in doors. Come on. Let's decompress. Show me how to get these pig goats to safety.
Star Okay, so you know that feeling when something is so adorable, you just need to smooooosh it?
Marco No.
Star So what you do is you just harness all that pent-up love and use it to give 'em a whack!
Star smacks a pig goat on the backside, and it runs out of the stable.
Pig Goat [squeals]
Star Easy peasy taco breezy!
Marco Okay, yeah, I'm not doing that.
Star It doesn't hurt them.
Marco It's not that.
One of the pig goats stares at Marco with red eyes.
Marco [whispers] I don't like their eyes.
Star and Marco [laughing]
Star Oh, Marco. You know... [sits on pig goat] I'm glad we're alone together, 'cause there's something I want to talk to you about. I remember what you said to me in the magic.
Marco [poking pig goat] Uh... [laughs] Okay, well, you're gonna have to remind me what I said unless it's really weird, and then maybe I don't wanna know.
Marco is about to sit on a pig goat's back, but it moves away, and Marco falls on the floor.
Pig Goat [bleats]
Star [giggles]
Marco Oh, no. I... I said something weird, didn't I?
Star Uh...
Marco Look, that place was like... it was like a dream! T-Those were fragments of my subconscious mind! [laughs nervously] I don't wanna know!
Star Marco. You told me you loved me.
There is a loud DRAMATIC STING in the musical score as Marco has a blank, wide-eyed stare.
Marco Ah. Okay. [hyperventilates] Okay. Okay, okay.
A pig goat backs up into Marco, and Marco sits on its back as it moves closer to Star. Marco covers his face with his hands.
Star Maybe it was just a fragment of your subconscious mind, but--
Marco No, it's... It's not a fragment of anything. That's the whole Marco. You know the... the whole Blood Moon curse? That whole deal? Well, it's... it's baloney. I've felt like this since the beginning. I mean, I-I'm not a little boy. I know that you don't just fall in love at first sight.
Pig Goat [bleats]
Marco The way I feel has just gotten more intense since we first met.
The pig goat chomps Marco's hoodie sleeve.
Marco And it was intense at the start, and I know it's in the way.
Star In the way? Marco, why does it have to be bad?
Marco It is bad if you don't want it.
Star [grabs Marco's collar] Okay, can we kiss?
Marco Uhh... please.
Star and Marco kiss for several seconds, then they pull away.
Star Marco... I want you to love me... because I love you.
The pig goats surround Star and Marco.
Star I think we have an audience.
Star and Marco [laugh]
Marco [whispers] The eyes! [normally] Maybe we ought to get back to the others.
Star Yeah, you're probably right.
Scene cuts to outside the stable.
Marco (o.s.) Ha-yaah!
The stable doors fly open, and the pig goats all run out. Star and Marco exit, with Star holding Marco's left arm.
Star Well done, Mr. Diaz.
Outside the Monster Temple, the cockerel is pacing back and forth and clucking. Inside the temple, Star and Marco enter, laughing and holding hands.
Star No, I can. I really can.
Star and Marco [laugh, sigh]
Star What the?
Moon and Eclipsa are locked in a magical confrontation. Eclipsa turns to face Star and Marco.
Star What's going on?
Eclipsa [to Moon] Do you want to tell your daughter what you did, or should I?
Moon's eyes stop glowing, and her expression softens.
Star Mom... what did you do?
Moon First of all, this did not go down the way I intended.
Star Uh, I... What do you mean "intended"?! Are you... Are you working for Mina?!
Moon No. Mina's working for me.
Off-screen, the cockerel crows.
(end song)
ved Star vs. the Forces of Evil Episode Transcripts
Season 1
Star Comes to EarthParty With a PonyMatch MakerSchool SpiritMonster ArmThe Other Exchange StudentCheer Up, StarQuest BuyDiaz Family VacationBrittney's PartyMewbertyPixtopiaLobster ClawsSleep SpellsBlood Moon BallFortune CookiesFreeze DayRoyal PainSt. Olga's Reform School for Wayward PrincessesMewnipendance DayThe Banagic IncidentInterdimensional Field TripMarco Grows a BeardStorm the Castle
Season 2
My New Wand!Ludo in the WildMr. Candle CaresRed BeltStar on WheelsFetchStar vs. Echo CreekWand to WandStarstruckCamping TripStarsittingOn the JobGoblin DogsBy the BookGame of FlagsGirls' Day OutSleepoverGift of the CardFriendenemiesIs MysteryHungry LarrySpider With a Top HatInto the WandPizza ThingPage TurnerNaysayaBon Bon the Birthday ClownRaid the CaveTrickstarBabyRunning with ScissorsMathmagicThe Bounce LoungeCrystal ClearThe Hard WayHeinousAll Belts are OffCollateral DamageJust FriendsFace the MusicStarcrushed
Season 3
Return to MewniMoon the UndauntedBook Be GoneMarco and the KingPuddle DefenderKing LudoToffeeScent of a HoodieRest in PuddingClub SnubbedStranger DangerDemoncismSophomore SlumpLint CatcherTrial by SquirePrincess TurdinaStarfariSweet DreamsLava Lake BeachDeath PeckPonymoniumNight LifeDeep DiveMonster BashStump DayHoliday SpellcialThe Bogbeast of BoggabahTotal Eclipsa the MoonButterfly TrapLudo, Where Art Thou?Is Another MysteryMarco Jr.Skooled!Booth BuddiesBam Ui Pati!Tough LoveDivideConquer
Season 4
Butterfly FolliesEscape from the Pie FolkMoon RemembersSwim SuitRansomgramLake House FeverYada Yada BerriesDown by the RiverThe Ponyhead Show!Surviving the SpiderbitesOut of BusinessKelly's WorldCurse of the Blood MoonPrincess Quasar Caterpillar and the Magic BellGhost of Butterfly CastleCornball!Meteora's LessonThe Knight ShiftQueen-NappedJunkin' JannaA Spell with No NameA Boy and His DC-700XEThe Monster and the QueenCornonationDoop-DoopBritta's TacosBeach DayGone Baby GoneSad Teen HotlineJannanigansMama StarReady, Aim, FireThe Right WayHere to HelpPizza PartyThe Tavern at the End of the MultiverseCleaved
Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.