Ready, Aim, Fire/Transcript

	Episode begins in Marco's point of view; he wakes up inside the lint catcher in Butterfly Castle.
Marco Diaz	[groans]
	The pink shimmer in Marco's eyes disappears as he regains his memories.
Marco	Huh? Star?
	Marco tries to move through the large accumulation of pink lint, but he falls over. He stands back up and pushes through the lint.
Marco	[grunting]
	A giant pile of lint falls on top of him.
Marco	Aah!
	Marco emerges from the lint with a sock on his face. He opens the lint catcher's door and jumps out.
Marco	[dusts himself off] How the heck did I end up in the lint catcher?
	When Marco steps on something, he hurts his foot and jumps up and down in pain.
Marco	Oww! Ow, ow, ow!
	There is a petrified crow on the floor with a yada-yada berry in its beak.
Marco	[picks up petrified crow] How did you get down here?
	Marco climbs up some castle stairs and finds a door blocked off by rocks.
Marco	Huh? Ohhh, come on!
	Marco desperately tries to push the rocks out of the way, but they don't budge. He tries picking at the rocks with the petrified crow, but nothing happens.
Marco	[sighs, to petrified crow] Did you know about this?
	Sebastian, Mina Loveberry's magically augmented crow, stomps up the castle stairs.
Sebastian	[snarls, shrieks]
	Marco hides as Sebastian flies overhead. Once Sebastian is gone, Marco makes a grappling hook out of the petrified crow and some clothes and climbs out of the hole onto the castle's main floor level.
Marco	[grunts, sighs] Thanks, "Robirda".
Hekapoo	(o.s., distant) Shutting down the portals was drastic enough.
Marco	Hekapoo?
	Marco peeks behind a rock.
Rhombulus	(o.s.) Desperate times call for desperate measures.
	Hekapoo, Rhombulus, and Omnitraxus Prime are having a secret meeting.
Hekapoo	But she's not even following the plan!
Rhombulus	Look, I just want that monster-smoocher out of Mewni, and she's our best option.
Omnitraxus Prime	Some risks are worth taking.
Hekapoo	But she's completely crazy!
Mina Loveberry	[crazed laughter] Oh, I'm the crazy one? The person saving our kingdom from monster invaders? Ha! [to stitched-up tapestry of Solaria Butterfly] Did you hear that, Queen? Our kingdom used to be great, but not anymore.
	Mina uses her pigtails like a helicopter to float up to her giant suit of armor.
Mina	It's time to give Mewni back to the Mewmans!
	Mina transforms to her muscular augmented form, and her suit of armor stands up.
Mina	And if that makes me crazy...
	Mina's armor picks up a sword handle, and it powers on to have a red energy blade. Mina points the blade at the Magic High Commission.
Mina	...I'm as cuckoo-cuckoo-cuckoo as they come! Sebastian, get me my helmet!
Marco	[sneaking away] I gotta find Star.
	Scene shifts to Star's point of view; she wakes up inside Doop-Doop's shed.
Star	Wha... Ohhh, where am I?
	The pink shimmer in Star's eyes disappears as she regains her memories. Doop-Doop rolls up beside her.
Doop-Doop	You're in Doop-Doop's house!
Star	[screams] Doop-Doop! Doop-Doop? [chuckles] I mean, Doop-Doop! How? Why? How?
Doop-Doop	Oh, it was the craziest thing. I was just laying down, singing to myself, and poof! Suddenly you're here, and now we're roommates! Oh, man, it's gonna be so great! We could stay up all night and talk and paint our nails. I don't have arms, but that's okay. [continues under] We can use our imaginations. Then maybe we could bake some cookies and talk about what boys we like. I mean, I don't really know what a "boy" is, since I've never even left this room...
	There are explosions in the distance.
Star	Huh? Wait a minute. That's coming from Eclipsa's castle!
	Star runs out of the shed and closes the door behind her.
Doop-Doop	[whistling]
	Star flies toward the Monster Temple on top of Cloudy.
Star	[to mirror phone] Call Marco!
Mirror Phone	Calling Marco.
	The phone rings, and then static.
Star	Ugh! Useless! Whoa!
	Star flies over Moon and River's yurt village. There is a stone wall and moat around it.
Star	What is this? Definitely don't remember this being here.
Village Guard	Hey! Who goes there?
Star	Oh, uh, I'm sorry. I'm, um, Star Butterfly.
Village Guard	Oh! My apologies. I thought you were one of them monsters. Hold on.
	The drawbridge in front of Star lowers. Moon appears from behind the drawbridge.
Moon Butterfly	[gasps] Star?
Star	Mom?!
Moon	The portals aren't working! How did you get to Mewni?
Star	I found another way.
Moon	Hurry! Get inside!
	Moon and Star enter the village, and the drawbridge closes. Cloudy disappears, and Star hugs Moon.
Star	Oh, Mommy, I'm so glad you're okay. When the portals were shut down, I didn't know. I thought something bad happened.
Moon	We're okay, Star.
Star	What is going on? I saw smoke and explosions.
Moon	Monster Temple is under attack. Everyone in the village is on lockdown.
Star	What?! Oh! Oh, my gosh! We gotta go now! Eclipsa needs us!
Moon	Star, I can't just leave. The yurt people depend on me to ensure their safety.
Star	Well, I guess that explains this huge wall you guys are putting up.
River Butterfly	[sitting on villager's shoulders] You there! Gather more stones for the gate! And you, shuck that corn!
Villager	Aah, okay!
Moon	You should stay here, too. It's far too dangerous out there.
Star	I've been by Eclipsa's side this whole time. I can't abandon her now.
Moon	Star, wait!
	Star summons Cloudy again and hops on his back.
Star	If you really want to protect me, you know where I'll be.
	Moon watches Star fly off in the direction of Monster Temple.
River	That's okay! I didn't want a hug, too!
	Scene shifts to Janna's point of view; she wakes up inside Meteora's room in the Monster Temple, covered by stuffed animals.
Janna Ordonia	[groans]
Glossaryck	(o.s.) Oh, look. She's finally awake.
	The pink shimmer in Janna's eyes disappears as she regains her memories.
Janna	What—! Aah!
Meteora Butterfly	[laughs, coos, claps her hands]
Janna	Um, what's going on? Where's Star?
Glossaryck	Star is with Doop-Doop.
Janna	That's, uh, not a real person's name. Never mind. I should know by now that you are never helpful.
	Janna walks off. Glossaryck and Meteora look at each other.
Glossaryck	[shrugs] Hmm.
Meteora	[giggles, puts stuffed animal on her head]
	Janna walks through the mostly abandoned Monster Temple.
Janna	Hello! Star? Marco? Huh. It is a dang ghost town up in here.
	There are loud thuds and screams coming from outside. Janna walks outside.
Janna	[gasps]
	Mewmans and monsters run away screaming as a giant suit of armor stomps through New Monstertown.
Janna	Hey, that's my boot!
	The suit of armor tears the roof off one of the houses.
Monsters	[scream]
	The suit of armor puts the roof back down and tears the roof off another house.
Mewmans	[scream]
	The suit of armor puts the roof back down again. It picks up a cart full of hay, then tosses it away. The cart flies toward Janna.
Janna	[screams]
Eclipsa Butterfly	Look out!
	Eclipsa appears and blows the cart away with her magic.
Janna	Whoa! Thanks for the lifesaving, dude.
Eclipsa	Don't thank me yet.
	The suit of armor starts climbing up the mountain toward the Monster Temple until it is face-to-face with Eclipsa and Janna.
Eclipsa	Now, my love!
	A tiny Globgor jumps out of a nearby bucket, grows to gigantic size, and punches the suit of armor away.
Eclipsa	Whoo!
Janna	Yeah!
Globgor	Get the villagers to safety! I'll take care of this!
Eclipsa	[to villagers] Hurry, everyone! While it's distracted, get inside where it's safe!
	The Mewman and monster villagers run inside the temple, then Eclipsa's royal guards block the stairs leading up to the temple. Globgor battles the giant suit of armor hand-to-hand. Globgor shrinks to small size and runs around on top of the suit of armor. The suit of armor tries swatting him like an insect. Globgor grows in size and kicks the suit of armor in the back, knocking it into the mountain.
Globgor	Ha-ha!
	Globgor charges at the suit of armor. The suit of armor draws its red energy sword and slashes Globgor's right arm, leaving a red glowing scar.
Globgor	[roars]
	As Globgor clutches his cut in pain, he starts to shrink uncontrollably.
Globgor	Huh? What? What is... What's happening?
	The suit of armor now towers over Globgor. Globgor tries to run away, but the suit of armor grabs him and hurls him toward the Monster Temple.
Globgor	Aah!
	Globgor's body slams into the wall over the temple entrance door, and he falls in front of Eclipsa and Janna.
Eclipsa	Aah! Globgor! Are you all right?!
Globgor	I... I'm fine. Just got the wind knocked out of— [groans]
	The glowing cut on Globgor's arm twitches.
Eclipsa	Oh, no... Janna, watch my husband. I'll take care of that brute myself.
Globgor	No! I can keep fighting. I just need to— [grunts]
	Globgor tries several times to grow to giant size, but he keeps shrinking back down.
Globgor	[groans, panting] What's... What's happening to me?
Eclipsa	Sweetie.
Royal Guard 1	Don't worry, Eclipsa! We'll protect you!
Royal Guard 2	For the queen!
Royal Guards	[shouting]
	The royal guards charge toward the suit of armor, but it kicks them away. The suit of armor stomps toward the temple. Eclipsa jumps into the air.
Eclipsa	Velvet Inferno!
	Eclipsa briefly pushes the suit of armor away with a crescent arc of energy, but it keeps stomping forward.
Eclipsa	[gasps] Black Widow Calamity Cobweb!
	Eclipsa ensnares the suit of armor in a web of energy that pins it to the ground.
Eclipsa	Let's go!
Globgor	No! I can still take it!
Eclipsa	I hit it with a very powerful spell that barely made a dent! We have to fall back!
	Eclipsa flies into the temple.
Globgor	[groans]
Janna	Come on, tough guy.
	Janna helps Globgor into the temple. The suit of armor rips through Eclipsa's energy web. Inside the temple, Eclipsa nurses Globgor's wound. A loud thud shakes the temple.
All	[gasp]
	The suit of armor has climbed onto the side of the temple mountain and is punching the temple with its fist.
Globgor	I can't take it anymore. I need to go back out there and fight that thing!
	Globgor is once again stopped by the stinging cut on his arm.
Globgor	[groans]
Eclipsa	Absolutely not! You're in no condition to fight.
Globgor	It's just a flesh wound. It's nothing.
Eclipsa	It is not nothing. I'd recognize that wound anywhere. That soldier... It was a Solarian Warrior.
Globgor	What?!
Lady Whosits	[gasps] A Solarian Warrior?!
Archibald	But how?!
Janna	Um... Yeah, should I know what this is, or...?
Eclipsa	A Solarian super-warrior. Queen Solaria created them to destroy all monsters. They were incredibly powerful, but that power made them unstable. I don't know how one of them managed to survive for this long.
Globgor	So what do we do? Can you fix this?
Eclipsa	I'm not sure. That sword was specially designed to do harm to monsters. But I'll do what I can.
	The Solarian Warrior punches a hole into the temple and starts pawing around the floor.
Globgor	[groans]
	Eclipsa helps Globgor move off to the side of the room, out of the Solarian Warrior's reach. The Solarian Warrior pulls its arm out of the hole in the wall and looks inside. Eclipsa and Globgor hide in fear.
Globgor	[groaning]
Eclipsa	Globgor, my love, I need you to go hide with Meteora.
Globgor	What?
Eclipsa	I'm going to try to get that thing away from our castle. [runs off]
Globgor	Eclipsa! No! [groans]
	As the Solarian Warrior continues to punch the mountain, the Mewmans and monsters in the village below run and take cover from falling rocks.
Villagers	[screaming]
	The Solarian Warrior gets blasted in the back by magic. It turns around to face Eclipsa.
Eclipsa	Get... out... of my kingdom!
	The Solarian Warrior pulls its fist back, and Eclipsa blinds it with magic light. Scene cuts away to Meteora's bedroom. Janna and Meteora are sitting on the floor, and Globgor is lying in bed while Archibald wraps his wounded arm in bandages.
Globgor	[groans]
Archibald	Sorry! Is it too tight?
Globgor	No, no. It's perfect. I feel ready to take on anything— [groans]
Archibald	Aah! I'm going to get more bandages.
Janna	Dude, maybe you just need to rest.
Globgor	I just feel like a coward. I never should've let her to fight that thing alone.
Janna	Are you kidding? You can barely make a fist. What could you possibly do? Eclipsa knows what she's doing. She's got this.
Globgor	This is true. She is terrifying. I love her so much!
	Scene cuts back outside the temple.
Eclipsa	[shouting]
	Eclipsa barrages the Solarian Warrior with arcs of energy. The Solarian Warrior throws punches at Eclipsa, but she flies around them. She keeps evading the Solarian Warrior's punches and attacking it with her magic.
Eclipsa	Midnight Shriek!
	Eclipsa blasts the Solarian Warrior with a huge beam of energy that knocks it to the ground. It tries to get back up, but Eclipsa keeps it pinned with a continuous magic blast. It soon overcomes Eclipsa's magic, and Eclipsa protects herself from the shockwave with her parasol. The Solarian Warrior finally hits Eclipsa with its hand...
Eclipsa	[groans]
	...and she falls to the ground. The Solarian Warrior appears above her and draws its energy sword. When it swings the sword down, Eclipsa shields herself with a barrier. The Solarian Warrior repeatedly swings its sword down on Eclipsa's barrier. Eclipsa starts getting pushed backward, and her barrier starts to crack.
Eclipsa	[gasping]
	(end song)