Return to Mewni/Transcript

	(theme song)
	Scene opens at the Diaz residence at night.
Angie Diaz	Did you hear that?
Rafael Diaz	Y-Yes. Maybe we should call the police.
Angie	Psh! Police. [pause] Hand me my nine-iron. There's only one law in this jungle: Mom's law.
	The couple tiptoes downstairs into the living room and turns on the lights. Marco is at the kitchen counter, his face sleeping in a bowl of oatmeal.
Barko Diaz	[barks]
Angie	Marco? It's 3 a.m.
Marco Diaz	[sad] Is it?
	He turns on a tape recorder and it plays sad music.
Angie	Honey, what are you doing up?
Marco	Nothing. [puppy licks face, to puppy] Barko Diaz, stop. We're sad now. Act sad.
Barko Diaz	[barks, licks oatmeal]
Marco	[licks oatmeal]
Angie	I'll take care of this. [grabs puppy] Maybe it's time [turns off music] we take down these decorations.
Marco	Mom, that's too soon. What if Star comes back? [turns on music] I want it to be like nothing's changed.
Angie	Oh, honey, I know this is hard. Look, I—
	Rafael begins dialing the phone
Angie	Rafael, what are you doing?
Rafael	[gesturing to Sad Teen flyer] I was just going to call the... the Teen Sadness hotline.
Angie	I told you. [turns off music] I got this.
Marco	[turns on music]
Rafael	[hangs up]
Angie	Well, how does your oatmeal taste?
Marco	Like empty nothingness. Mom, can you be addicted to crying?
Angie	How about some Captain Blanche's Sugar Seeds?
Marco	[grunts] Star loved Sugar Seeds. [puts head on table, turns up the music]
Angie	I'll pour you a bowl.
Marco	I tried. I can't even find the box.
Star's voice	(o.s.) They're in the cupboard behind the dog food.
Marco	I hid it so well.
Star	(o.s.) Behind the dog food, Diaz!
Marco	Star would eat all of them.
	The scene pans out to Star Butterfly, who's watching Marco's plight via her wand. She's in a carriage, wearing Marco's red hoodie.
Marco	And now they're both gone!
Star	It's behind the dog food, Marco. Stop being so dramatic. [ends spell] Why do you have to be such a cute idiot? [sniffs hoodie] Oh, Marco, yuck! When was the last time you washed this thing?!
Moon Butterfly	[driving the carriage] Star! We need to be quiet! We don't know who might be listening.
Star	[opening carriage door] Sorry Mom. [the door falls off] Sorry.
Moon	It's okay. Can you check on the Commission?
Star	Yeah, they seem... okay.
	Omnitraxus Prime, Rhombulus, and Hekapoo have been turned into balloons, and they are being pulled by the carriage. Hekapoo has a bird's nest on top of her.
Star	Still in their stasis. Oh, looks like ol' Hekapoo is gonna be an auntie! So, how exactly are we going to de-balloonify them?
Moon	Once we're at the Sanctuary, the Well of Magic should be able to rejuvenate them.
Star	And Lekmet's gonna meet us there?
Moon	[pauses] Yes, he'll meet us there.
Star	[laughing] Okay, great. So, what's up with that warnicorn?
Moon	What?
	The warnicorn stars panting heavily before he vanishes entirely in a puff of smoke. The carriage begins to veer out of control.
Star	Mom! Mom, what is going on?
Moon	It's the fritz!
	The carriage turns into a plain wooden wagon.
Moon	It's causing all magic to...
	The wagon turns into a smaller "Butter Flyer" red wagon.
Moon	...to weaken and...
	The wagon disappears altogether, leaving just Star, Moon, and the three balloons. They skid to a halt.
Moon	...fade. [pause] It's okay. We're all right as long as we have this magical path to guide us.
	The lights on their path buzz, and they too disappear.
Moon	I guess we're setting up camp.
	Scene jumps forward in time. Moon is trying to magically start a fire.
Moon	[grunts, sighs in defeat]
Star	I got this one Mom. [holds out her wand, glowing with green magic]
Moon	Stop! It's corrupted!
Star	What? No, no, no, it's fine! Don't worry about it. It does this all the time. Glossaryck never cared.
Moon	[wrestling Star] Glossaryck isn't here, and, ugh, and he's probably not coming back.
Star	[stops wrestling] Wait. What do you mean?
Moon	Toffee has Glossaryck, and your wand seems tainted by his magic as well. It's the same magic I saw when I fought Ludo. Now let's start a fire, and we'll head for the Sanctuary in the morning. [grunts opening her suitcase] There must be some helpful in here. [pulls out an ear of corn with a note] "I corn't wait to see you again." [tosses it aside, pulling out more items] Uh, did your father pack this with nothing but...
	Moon pulls out a hand fan with a picture of River in his underwear, sending kisses. Its caption reads "Miss you!! Kisses OXOX River (your husband)"
Moon	Ugh, no. [throws out fan, groans] What are you doing?
Star	[at the fire rubbing sticks together, the pile ignites] Staring a fire. Duh.
Moon	Did your father teach you that?
Star	No, Marco did. Marco taught me a lot, like how to mope, self-pity... Ya know, all the cool teen stuff. And now that's all I have.
	Moon stamps out the fire with her foot.
Star	Wha— Mom!
Moon	Shh-shh-shh! [gestures]
	While hiding in two bushes, Star and her mother watch as some mice sniff the area.
Moon	[whispering] It looks like they're just scouts. We'll let them—
Star	[sneaking up behind them, whispering] Mom, check it out! [gestures to wand, glowing with green magic]
Moon	Star! No!
	The mice hear Moon and scamper.
Star	Ugh! Fine!
	Star then takes off chasing them. She grabs a stick, and leaps in front of them. One mouse jumps out at Star.
Star	Stick blast!
	She swings, hitting the mouse into the air. Moon catches it.
Star	[smacking more mice] Yah!
Moon	[chasing Star] Star!
	She spins her stick while the final mouse spins another mouse. The mouse is thrown on to Star's stick, and she shakes it off. The mouse lands next to their belongings.
Star	Aah! I did it! I did it! Yeah! I did it!
Moon	Star, we need to get out of here immediately. I can't believe you would be so foolish as to...
	A mouse squeaks as it releases the High Magic Commission's balloons to the wind.
Moon	[gasps] The High Commission!
	The pair take off after the balloons; in addition, Star makes a face at one of the rats. They keep running; Moon even jumps to reach the balloons, but they are too far out of reach. The balloons continue to drift further away.
Moon	[stopping to pant] Where, where did they go?
Star	They're right there.
	Star points to a tree littered with thorns and the skeletons of dead creatures.
Star	[grinning] Guess we're goin' up.
Moon	Ugh, fine.
	Scene jumps ahead to when they are climbing.
Moon	[pushing aside thorny branches, grumbling] Ugh, never listens to her mother.
Star	C'mon, Mom! What's the big deal?
	As she speaks, some of the vines attempt to grab her.
Moon	[climbs, grunts] The big deal is your recklessness has put us in harm's way. [climbs, grunts]
Star	It's just a little danger.
	Star climbs by a skeleton wearing a purple hat.
Star	[picks up hat] I've been in way worse than this. [elbows skeleton] You know what I'm talkin' about.
Moon	Mmm! Mmm!
	Moon has been trapped by vines which cover her mouth.
Star	[gasping] Mom! [pulls her out] Are you okay?
Moon	[grunts] Let's just get the Magical High Commission and get out of here.
Star	Okay [returns the hat to the skeleton]
	Scene skips ahead. Star and Moon Butterfly are now at the top of the tree untangling the High Commission balloons.
Moon	[gasps] The Sanctuary!
	The camera pans over a large lake and calm music plays. Star and Moon walk up to an alligator like creature.
Star	[laughs] Is it, like, a little Sanctuary guardian?
Moon	No, he's the gatekeeper.
Star	Wait, what?
Moon	Bwah!
Gatekeeper	Bwaaah!
Moon	Rahh!
Gatekeeper	Wahh!
	The two continue to exchange similar noises.
Star	She's lost her marbles.
Gatekeeper	Wah!
	The gatekeeper then crawls into the water. Soon, it rises above the water, supported by a large pile of similar creatures.
Gatekeepers	Wah! Wah!
	The pile continues to rise. All the creatures then leap off the pile to reveal the Sanctuary now above the water.
Star	Whoa.
	Moon and Star cross the water via stepping stones, and enter the Sanctuary.
Star	Whoa! [looks at ceiling] Look at all the Glossarycks.
Moon	Yes, Star. The queens of Mewni have been coming here for generations.
Star	What now?
	Moon rotates a valve which raises three large flowers from the depths of the pool inside the Sanctuary.
Moon	All right. Let's get the Commission into their pods so we can revive them.
Star	[to balloons] Let's go, guys!
	Star ties each balloon to one of the flower pods. Each pod lights up once she's finished tying.
Moon	All right, I'm going to open the Wellspring. Stand clear.
	Moon rotates another valve, which causes troughs to unfold, delivering a liquid to each flower pod.
Star	Is that stuff supposed to be all black and goopy like that?
Moon	[gasps] No, it's not!
	Moon quickly closes the valve; they both then climb up to the top of the Wellspring.
Star	Oh, I feel like that's not how it's supposed to look.
Moon	[gasps] It's worse than I'd feared.
Star	Mom?
Moon	We'll have to go with plan B.
Star	All right, Plan B. What's plan B?
Moon	We'll talk about that after we get settled in. Look at you, you're covered in scratches. Let's fix you up.
	Moon takes Marco's hoodie off of Star, and tears off one of its arms to make a bandage.
Star	[gasps] What are you doing?!
Moon	Star, what do you want me to do? It's in tatters already. [ties the bandage on Star]
Star	Uh, Mom? If the well is messed up, how are we going to revive the Magic High Commission?
Moon	We don't need to worry about that right now, Star. This sanctuary is very well hidden. [pushes some bushes aside, revealing a vending machine] Now, do you want creamed corn or corned cream?
Star	What?
Moon	To eat, Star. Generations of Butterflys have come here in times of danger. We'll be safe for as long as it takes. Now, do you have any change?
Star	Wait, so we're just going to hide? That's your plan B? That's a terrible plan B!
Moon	Your safety is my priority right now.
Star	Uh, I didn't blow up my whole life just so you could give up! Come on, we could track those rats back to Toffee and end this whole thing!
Moon	Even if the Magical High Commission was okay, we still wouldn't be strong enough to defeat Toffee. Our best bet is to lay low until the situation changes.
Star	You lied to me. [paces away]
Moon	Star, what are you doing?
Star	[turns around] What else have you lied about, Mom? I bet Lekmet isn't even meeting us here!
Moon	Lekmet is dead, Star. And it could happen to us too. Toffee won't stop until he finds this!
	Moon Butterfly holds out a vial with Toffee's finger in it.
Star	Did you take that from my closet? And you're just carrying it around?
Moon	It's too dangerous to do anything but stay.
Star	No! I am not hiding here until I am old and gray like you! This has to mean something! [holds up wand]
Moon	No, Star! The wands are linked! He'll find us!
Star	Oh, like he won't find us with you carrying his finger around! I defeated him once! I can do it again! Fantastic Exit Beam!
Moon	Star, stop!
Star	Why?! What happened to cool warrior queen Mom?!
Moon	I was never a cool warrior queen, Star. [tearing up] I was a happy-go-lucky girl like you. And then Toffee and his monsters killed my mother.
	Star freezes, her mouth agape and wand still in position to cast a spell. She lowers her wand. Moon walks over to a bench, sits down, and covers up her face with her hands.
Star	[meekly] I thought you sent Grandma to a grandma farm to hang out with other grandmas.
Moon	[sigh] Oh, Star.
	Star sits down besides her. After a pause, Moon looks at Star's wand, smiles briefly, causing Star to smile briefly.
Star	Tell me.
Moon	I was about your age when it happened. I didn't know what to do, so I spoke to Eclipsa.
Star	Eclipsa Eclipsa? But she's been dead for hundreds of years!
Moon	No. Eclipsa's alive. And I made a deal with her.